Do you have a toxic friend?

Danielle Limonchik

More stories from Danielle Limonchik


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The film “Mean Girls” perfectly encapsulates what it means to be in toxic friendship.

Is there a certain person in your life for whom you’re constantly walking on eggshells? After spending time with this person, do you feel like your mood has worsened or that your energy has been drained from you? There are many acquaintances in our lives who make us feel this way and that’s normal. It’s not realistic to become best friends with everyone who comes across your path. However, when the person that makes you feel this way is your friend, or supposed to be, it makes the entire situation that much worse. Chances are, you have a toxic friend on your hands.

Some toxic behaviors include being passive-aggressive towards you, never being happy for you, always flaking on you/always having an excuse as to why they can’t hang out with you, acting jealous of you or straight up insulting and being mean to you. Everyone has their bad days every once in a while, but that’s the key. For someone to count as a toxic friend, these behaviors have to be a regular occurrence.

In these situations, it’s easy to blame yourself for your friend’s behavior. “Did I do or said something wrong?”It can be quite jarring, having someone who you were previously so close to suddenly switch on you out of the blue. This person could have a plethora of reasons for acting the way they suddenly do. Especially after doing everything you can to find out what’s troubling them and trying to console them, it’s not your fault.

But that’s exactly why people like this are called toxic friends. They leave you second guessing yourself while you try to chase them back into your life. Stop letting these people control your emotions and humiliate you.

If you find yourself in this situation, you need to cut these kinds of “friends” out of your life as soon as possible. It can be difficult and scary, especially if you’ve been friends with this person for a very long time. It’s not easy to leave your comfort zone and make new friends, but in the end, it’s worth it. It’s much better to be alone than to be surrounded by people who make you feel alone.